You Have Everything You Need
My overarching theme for 2019 is You Have Everything You Need.
At first glance, it might appear that I’m just referring to material possessions. As someone who has spent a lot of money in the past on frivolous things, I’m eager to feel at my core that I truly have everything I need — I have everything I need in terms of clothing, handbags, shoes, makeup… the list goes on.
But besides material possessions, I also want to learn that I have everything I need to heal myself, wholly and completely. When I left my full-time job in mid-2018, my adrenals were shot, I was constantly stressed, I felt a lot of anxiety, and I had anger issues. I’m a lot better now, but I’m not all the way there. This year, I’d like to get more of the way there.
It’s going to be hard to tell at the end of the year whether I’ve achieved my overall theme for the year because You Have Everything You Need is not exactly measurable. So, in order to have some concrete actions that I can track throughout 2019 and measure at the end of the year, I’ve set eight tactical goals to keep me moving in the right direction. Some of these may seem strange, mundane, or even pointless, but I’ve learned over the years that little habits really do add up to lasting changes.
2019 Review
At the end of 2019, I am thrilled to report that my annual theme has permeated my very being! Every part of me now feels that I truly have everything I need, and this is such a liberating feeling. Of course, I still want a few things, but usually I understand I don’t actually need them. While I still struggle from time to time (kawaii things in Japan, I’m looking at y’all!), the feeling of enough is a very comforting place to return to.
This year, I also realized that I do in fact have everything within me to be myself again — a happy, positive person who loves to learn and grow. That person was starting to fade away, and I’m so glad she’s back. A year away from the corporate world and away from full-time work did wonders for me. I’m so grateful to have had this experience, and I’m excited to see where this path will take me.
Overall, I feel like I ended 2019 in a much better place than where I started, and that is ultimately what annual goals are all about.
Goal #1: Start and maintain a manifestation journal
Manifestation journals and vision boards have never really been my cup of tea. I thought they were a little too woo-woo, and I wasn't at a place in my life where I was ready to admit that I wasn't content with continuing along with the status quo. I enjoyed the safety, security, and income afforded to me by my full-time job, and I was too busy spending my hard-earned money on material goods, travel, and experiences to think about how I wanted to live life differently. Now that I've bitten the bullet and quit my job, I have the time and space to design the life I want to lead going forward. I'm hoping my manifestation journal will help with that.
2019 review
I wrote in my manifestation journal a lot at the beginning of the year, but my entries slowly tapered off. Even still, I feel that the journal contributed to my life in a serendipitous sort of way. While I didn’t achieve or attain everything I thought I wanted to “manifest,” with hindsight, I can see that I actually ended up better off for not having achieved or attained those things.
At the beginning of 2019, I felt excited but also incredibly lost and confused. I was very happy, but I was often frustrated at myself for taking too many breaks or being too lazy or resting too much. I suddenly had a world of options in front of me, and it was hard for me to choose one direction and gain any meaningful momentum. When I look back on the entries in my manifestation journal, I see confusion, thick fog, and hazy desires.
Amazingly, a series of fortunate encounters and lucky chances made everything fall into place at the end. I attribute this to the manifestation journal working in such a way that allowed me to be open to these opportunities.
Goal #2: Focus on building passive income streams and potentially earning active income at “fun” jobs (no permanent full-time employment)
At the time of writing, it has been four months since my last day of work at my full-time job, and I've adjusted incredibly well to my newfound freedom and flexibility. To my surprise, I haven't felt much boredom. In fact, it's been quite the opposite. I feel incredibly excited about life, and I'm full of ideas. There are so many things I want to do, and I feel like there aren't enough hours in the day. This zest for life is something that had been missing for a long time, and I would love to be able to live like this indefinitely. To this end, I want to make an effort during 2019 to build some passive income streams. I'm not sure what this will entail, but I'll be exploring my options. I'd also like to try a few "fun" jobs and earn some active income on a part-time, seasonal, or contract basis to supplement my passive income.
2019 review
Even though I didn’t hit upon anything groundbreaking in terms of passive income, I consider this goal a huge success! The only significant movement came from me rebalancing my portfolio to make sure I was comfortable with my investments. When I reconciled my finances spreadsheet at the end of the year, I saw that my investments did very well. Even though these are paper gains, it gives me some comfort that my financial situation is stable.
The active income part of this goal is where I really came into my own again. I completed a number of projects for an organization I’ve worked with for more than a decade, I dabbled in ghost-writing, I facilitated a couple of webinars for my friend’s company, I worked a very hectic one-month contract at the TIFF call centre, and best of all, I started a contract role with Firefly Creative Writing — where I’m surrounded by incredibly inspiring people.
Aside from the project work, all my other roles this year exposed me to brand new experiences. I found my voice again, got over my fear of interacting with people, and learned so much — both in terms of work-related tasks and also my own strengths, weaknesses, likes, and dislikes. Trying all of these different jobs helped get a little closer to what I want to do going forward. And while I’m still not exactly sure what that is, I’m happy to continue the journey with a bit more focus.
Goal #3: Meditate for at least one hour per day (two hours would be ideal)
After successfully completing the Vipassana 10-day silent meditation course, I've realized the value of meditation. I'd like to try to maintain at least one hour of meditation per day to see if the benefits continue in 2019. Ideally, I'll meditate for two hours per day; however, I know this will be a huge challenge as I'll also be trying to keep up with strength training, my step goal, reading, journalling, YouTube, blogging, and my various other interests and hobbies. Not to mention, I also want to spend quality time with my family and friends! Realistically, I'll likely only be able to meditate for one hour on most days.
2019 review
I didn’t do so well with this goal. The beginning of the year was great — I was meditating for two hours a day pretty consistently. Then it fell to 1 hour. Then it fell to 10 minutes. Then it fell to zero minutes. And now? Still zero minutes. This goal just fell off my list of priorities. I still see the value of meditation, and I still meditate from time to time, but it’s not currently a part of my daily routine.
Goal #4: Log at least 10,000 steps per day
This goal is really important to me as I find that staying active benefits me both mentally and physically. I love meeting my 10K step goal — going outside (or even just going to the gym for half an hour) changes my mindset and gives me some much needed perspective. If I had to categorize any of my goals as being "non-negotiable," it would be this one.
2019 review
Yes, yes, yes! This is an important goal to me and I was able to achieve this every single day in 2019.
Goal #5: Strength train at least two times per week for 10+ minutes per session
Strength training was on my list of 2018 goals, but I was wildly inconsistent. Somehow, I was always able to talk myself out of even a 10-minute strength training session. As I mentioned last year, I'm getting older, and I really need to maintain my physical strength and fitness, so I'd like to give this goal a solid effort in 2019.
2019 review
Strength training? Ugh! I didn’t do well with this at all. I was doing yoga regularly for a while, but that dropped off around late spring or early summer. This again just wasn’t a priority for me this year.
Goal #6: Meet my average monthly expense target
Since I won't be working full-time in 2019, I won't have an annual savings goal like I've had in previous years. Instead, I've set a monthly expense target that I'd like to meet on average. I've tried sticking to specific expense categories in the past and I find that very difficult to maintain, so I'll be sticking to the monthly expense target on an overall basis. I've set the target high enough so hubby and I can still treat ourselves periodically (perhaps even take a vacation at some point), but also low enough that I won't draw down a significant portion of my savings.
2019 review
Success! I ended the year at 82% of my annual budget (or 18% below budget).
Goal #7: Show all my purchases in my 2019 no-buy
In 2018, I ended up going on an accidental no-buy year in the categories of clothing and accessories (shoes, handbags, jewellery, etc.), and it felt really good. I saved a lot of money, and I was able to meet last year's annual savings goal because I was so significantly under budget by the end of the year. I'd like to try a no-buy again in 2019. I'm still working out the details, but I'll be sharing everything I buy in 2019. I won't be showing gifts I buy for others, but I will be showing everything else, including groceries.
2019 review
Taking photos of everything I brought into the home got old fast, but I did it! I ended up sharing all of these on my What I Bought This Week blog series. I wasn’t as diligent on YouTube, but I made sure to post periodic updates every few months. Overall, I’d say this goal gave me a new perspective on the things I bring into my home. I learned a lot about myself and my shopping habits — my tendencies to hoard, my love-hate relationship with free stuff, my shopping weaknesses. Buuuuut not everything I learned was negative! This ongoing reflection and discussion on my shopping habits really helped me with my theme for the year. I came away from this goal truly feeling that I have everything I need from a material goods standpoint.
Goal #8: Spend the entire winter in Toronto
I was initially toying with the idea of no travel for a year, but I thought that might be too restrictive. Instead, hubby and I are going to try spending the entire winter in Toronto without travelling. This might sound like an easy goal, but hubby and I have taken a winter holiday every year since I can remember. It's a huge departure for us to spend all of December through to March in Toronto, so it will be interesting to see how we feel this year. I'm quite excited about this goal, so fingers crossed, it goes well.
2019 review
At first, this seemed like an easy, throwaway goal. But then you start peeling away the layers and find…
… that hubby and I have made it a habit to travel every year during the winter. We don’t like the cold.
… that I’ve needed to travel to get a brief reprieve from seasonal affective disorder. In the past, I’ve had a terrible time with winter blues — too much time in my cubicle and too little time in daylight likely contributed to this. I became so apprehensive about winter that I would start dreading its approach in the fall. Then I would dread it more after the holidays. Then even more in January. Then came February — what felt like the longest month ever.
… that I have a tremendous fear of being bored. Not travelling in the winter means more time at home, which means more time to be bored. I had serious doubts I’d be able to keep my sanity, with all that staying home with nothing to do. Knowing this, I planned a tidying challenge in the 30 days leading up to spring, during which I vlogged, tidied, and posted videos every single day. This was key as it kept me busy and productive, I got to interact with my YouTube family, and my home was nicely decluttered by the first day of spring.
Spending last winter in Toronto opened my eyes to how beautiful life can be in your own home — even in the dead of winter, and in the slushy, sloppy, and grey concrete jungle that is downtown Toronto. I LOVED last winter. When I wasn’t tidying or working on my personal projects, I cozied up and did hyggelig things. This goal had such an impact on me that I didn’t dread winter at all this year! In fact, I don’t even feel like we’re in winter right now (and I’m writing this on January 15, 2020). I feel bright, happy, and full of excitement.